Self Esteem

It may be surprising but it is true that that children have self-esteem just as much as adults. Developing self-esteem in your toddler helps her to be both successful and happy. Your toddler's self-esteem reflects her views about herself. Although self-esteem may not affect your child as a toddler, developing a good self-esteem from her early days helps her greatly in her later years.

Developing good self-esteem is something that your toddler has to work out for herself. However, this does not mean that you have no role in building good self-esteem in your toddler.

How to help your toddler develop self-esteem

• Make your toddler aware that you will always love her and will pay her attention whenever she requires.
• Respect her feelings just as you like your feelings being respected.
• Encourage your toddler to problem-solve on her own. Avoid taking that extra step and advising her before she asks you for advice. Allow her to explore her world for herself when it is safe to do so.
• If your toddler appears to struggle to do something that is a bit difficult for her, provide her with encouragement. Encouragement goes a long way in motivating your toddler and developing her self-esteem. Assure her that you will always support her even if she fails. Do not rush to do the task for her without giving her sufficient time to do it by herself.
• Give your toddler the respect, praise and encouragement she deserves.
• Help your toddler achieve good communication skills.
• Start training her in good manners as early as possible.
• Set yourself as an example. Portray yourself with good self-esteem in front of your toddler.
• Allow your toddler to do things for herself if she can do so.
• If your toddler exhibits bad behaviour, make it clear to her that it is her behaviour which is bad and not her.
• Remember the "Each finger is different" rule. Never compare her with an elder sibling, your neighbour's kid or anyone else.
• Do not tease her or scold her using exaggerations such as "always" or "never".
• Avoid expecting your toddler to be perfect in everything from day one or from a very early date. Give her time to practise to perfection. However if you do not have any expectation at all, it can de-motivate your toddler.
• You can show her photographs from her baby days. She will enjoy seeing how big she has become.
• Teach her to borrow things only after seeking permission from the owner.
• Use your toddler's name as many times as possible when you converse with her. This can make her feel special.
• Record your toddler's voice as she learns to speak and also after her vocabulary has improved. Play the tape to her and tell her how happy you are about her improvement.
• Be consistent in setting your limitations and expectations for your toddler.
• Allow your toddler to make simple decisions. You can place two choices of breakfast in front of her and ask her what she would like to have.
• Never criticize or blame your toddler for committing a mistake. Allow her to learn from her mistakes.
• Praise your toddler for any successful achievement.
• Assign small chores to your toddler so that she can feel responsible. Toddlers enjoying "feeling big" like adults.




Video on Teaching Young Children to Help with Chores



• Give your toddler a chance to look back on what she has accomplished with pride and satisfaction.
• Help your toddler identify her strengths and weaknesses. This can also help her in overcoming disappointments.

Remember, a child with good self esteem will be able to:

• Take her own decisions
• Be proud of her achievements
• Control her frustration
• Undertake new tasks and challenges
• Handle her emotions
• Help others with low self-esteem tackle their problems